Losing a loved one is never easy. It is even harder when the death is untimely or due to unnatural or traumatic causes. Grief causes feelings of shock, numbness, pain, sadness, frustration, guilt, anger and fear. It is a natural response to the loss of a family member, friend or an unborn child. The closer you are to that situation, more severe the feelings due to the loss. And, while there is no correct or incorrect way to deal with the loss, there are healthy coping skills for grief management. How you grieve and how much time you grieve for depends on many factors such as your closeness to the person, your personality, the reason and timing of the loss, your support system, life experience and your faith and belief system. Grief follows its own process; for some people it may last for a few months, a year or so for few and for some, it can’t even be measured in years. However, it is important to work through the feelings of pain, sadness and grief once the individual is ready for it.

Kunal and Preeti got married a few months ago after several years of dating. In just a few months after marriage, their world seems to have turned upside down. The feelings of love and happiness have now turned into anger, bitterness and resentment. They feel burdened by a mountain of expectations and desires. Preeti shares very seriously that marriage is not all what you see in movies; it is not just champagne and strawberries. She breaks into a smile and shares that, in fact, initially marriage is more like Tom and Jerry! But unlike Tom and Jerry, one doesn’t even have separate rooms to go and sulk in after a fight or a misunderstanding!! Kunal and Preeti both believe that the fantasy of marriage is so different from its reality. They feel that their relationship is slipping through their fingers like sand. Are you at the periphery of marriage? Can you, perhaps, relate to bits of this story?

 

Do you constantly find yourself on your phone? Are you picking up calls, reading messages, Whatsapp’s or checking Facebook updates before the beep is over? Do you find yourself checking and re-checking your phone even when there are no messages? These are signs that display nervousness, stress and anxiety.

At a party recently, I heard a shocked socialite asking a guest, “You neither drink nor smoke?” These days drinking and smoking have become almost an accepted part of socialising. However, it is very important to understand when “you want a drink to have a good time” changes to “you need a drink to have a good time”, thereby, veering towards addiction.